You gotta love technology, American Airlines now has WiFi on some flights. It amazes me that I took a six-hour flight to the west coast last week and neither plane was equipped with in-flight WiFi, but my short 1hr 55min flight from ORD to BOS has it. It’s a little strange when you go on Porn Hub on a flight with your neighbor about 6 inches from you. Anyway I am on the 6:10 flight because I was an ahole and missed my 3pm flight, first time in my career that I missed a flight, so how do you to kill time in an airport (besides stare at hot chicks) well drink of course. So for the last 3 hours I’ve been drinking, Bud bottles at a bar. I was on the standby list too, so I didn’t even had a guaranteed seat and pretty much was accepting the fact that I was gonna be too wasted to get on the 8:30 one.
So boarding time rolls around, I go over to the American Airlines agents (who clearly know that I’ve been drinking) to see if I had a seat, I didn’t coach was full. The one open seat was in first class and they were waiting for some lady with the last name Osborne, they gave this woman like 9 chances and kept calling her name. Finally, the plane was completely boarded and they were waiting for this last chick to show up. As luck would have it I was next, she didn’t show and I got the first class upgrade big dog seat, I feel like I hit the lottery. I think the stewardess knew I was boozed up too, cause she asked me if I could open the exit door thing if we crashed, I flexed at her, she gave me a strange look. I love Amercia