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Archive for October, 2010

What’s in the fucking water today, cause everyone has been going a little nuts. We’ve Big Mick coming out of retirement to hammer Pitt for a Nickle, then another Big Dawg Hammer “I only bet $500 per game” is going large on the over of the Phillies – Giants over 5 1/2 runs tonight (which I love) and Duceman is putting his life savings on The Ohio State and 281 is doing his best Erin Andrews impersonation and watching from the sidelines.

For me this afternoon I am in love with the Texas Ranger over team total 4 1/2 runs.  If you recall I took this bet exactly one week ago on my Over Saturday.  Phil Hughes pitched lights out against the Twinkies, but he won’t repeat, the Rangers can rake.   Don’t let the ESPN Bottom line fool you (it’s running that Phil Hughes hasn’t allowed an ER in 15 1/3 innings in Arlington).  Take the over 4 1/2 Hughes and the bullpen blow up.

Good luck

-SD

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First night of the second round of the MLB playoffs, the start of the ALCS.  The Evil fucking Empire versus the Texas Rangers, I’m stoked.  As a diehard Yankee fan (since 1985) I am one of about a dozen people who are actually gives a shit about this series, unless you have money on the series. So I am here to help make everyone New York City Yankee fans for the next 2 weeks, jump on my back and I’ll show you to the promise land.

I wrote a blog about how 281 sends me a text before every series ‘what do you think about the Yankees?’  a couple weeks back. Well here is your answer to the one you’ll probably send me 15 minutes before the first pitch tonight.

Why the Yankees will win this series:

1) No Cliff Lee in game one or two. Huge blow for the Rangers…thank you Tampa Bay.  This CJ Wilson kid is a nice story, but someone with one playoff series of experience against the best American League pitcher, has no shot. Rangers need to be in position to split in Texas before going to New York and now the odds are stacked against them to even win on game in Texas.

2) Curtis Granderson -he tweaked his swing mid summer and went from platoon player to the weapon we traded our best prospect for.   Tore it up against the Twinkies .445 avg/ 1.227 ops and some clutch hitting.

3) Andy Pettitte – My favorite Yankee after Don Mattingly and Jason Giambi, most people argue that Mo Rivera is our key, but who gets him the ball? Andy does.  He won three clinching series games last year and has most post season wins in MLB History.

Why Texas will not win the ALCS

1) Experience – I hate using the ‘experience excuse’ but  this team doesn’t have it and neither does their Hall of Fame president Nolan Ryan.  The Ryan express pitched in only 9 games during his 27 year career.

2) Vlad Guerrero –  I love seeing Vlad bat against the Yankees.  He swings at shit, makes bad base running mistakes and no longer is a threat in the field which was his best attribute against us.  He’s an automatic out, Girardi and the Yankees staff have him game planned.  Ron Washington will stick with him too long and he’ll end up killing the Rangers in a key At Bat.

3) Daryl Strawberry – Dude, we’re the fucking Evil Empire of course we have a plan B.  The Yankees Brass have this covered off,  if this series goes 6 or 7 they are gonna launch an attack at the Rangers top dog.  Josh Hamilton, who is a sniff of O’Douls from going on a bender that would make Hunter S. Thompson and Scott Weiland vomit from sheer disgust, is a sitting duck.  The Yankees will send Darrryl to wherever Hamilton goes after game five to congratulate him on his performance, a handshake later and that rapist wit will lead those two down a dark path that will end somewhere in Reno around 9:30am the next day. Trust me this has been discussed thoroughly. Mike Bloomberg even probably signed off on it.

Sorry but I got to wrap this up, game 1 is about to start.  Go Yankees take them -185

Good luck

-SD

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Ok, unless you’ve been suck under a cave you’ve probably heard that there are 33 Chilean Miners stuck under ground since August.  There hasn’t been such a big effort to rescue something from being buried since my friend Hammer was addicted to online black jack and WAR.  The process of sending a rescue capsule is very interesting to me for a couple of reasons.  First, a small tube needs to pull all 33 miners (plus 5 rescuers) up 1/2 from underneath the earth.  Think about how you use to send your money to the teller as MassBank, except the rolled quarters are 150 pound Chileans.  A 1/2 mile is a fucking long way and the loose earth soil is unpredictable.  So I am making a prop bet…

O/U of Chilean Miners that make it our unscathed O/U 27.5 miners – Any takers?

Second, Big Mick just texted me (after I mentioned that I didn’t give a shit about the miner being rescued) that the Chilean Miners had TV, Movies, Porn and Soccer to watch while being trapped for a 68 day vacation away from their wives.  Got to be honest here, I am having a difficult time finding a soft spot for the Chilean Miners.  They have grown to be International TV stars, kind of like Matthew McConaughey in EdTV.  They’ll never have to buy another beer in a pub for the rest of their lives and they are all getting sympathy pussy, TV and book deals.  I would have volunteered to be trapped in that cave  AND lost a hand in the process to be the 34th miner.

Changing the odds O/U is 25.5 these dudes are too lucky to lose that many in a rescue pod.

Good luck

-SD

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My OVERs Saturday was a hit, went 2-3 and should have hit Hughes, but Delmon Young choked 2x.  I’ve never worked for a company that has given me a Columbus Day off, I need to move to the Bahamas stat.  So I decided this morning to retire, by purchasing a scratch ticket from the local convenience store.  $25 and 5 Monopoly scratchy’s later I am still not in a position to quit my job (anyone want a winner go to the White Hen in the North End, the Monopoly ticket is due).  So with no holiday tomorrow and pile of loser tickets I turn the next sure thing.  NFL week 5 Teasers!
But I’m feeling real nice this morning and I guess you could say I am a lot like Christopher Columbus.  I’m a simple Italian voyager taking a risk on an NFL Sunday with a bunch of teasers.  Which is similar to Columbus’s trip across the Atlantic to find the West when everyone said he was dumb.  He ended up landing in the Bahamas and hooking up with a bunch of hot Native American Bahama chicks.  So call my teasers dumb and risky, but if you want to find the promise land in week 5, jump on board the The Seth Maria

Indy -2 / New Orleans -1 – Indy is coming off a lose to Jacksonville, I don’t think they are as good as most people think, but an easy home win by at least 5+ points today.  Wish I got this at -1, but 2 is fine.  Then on the back-end take New Orleans on the road over Arizona.  The Cardinals are starting a 25 year old rookie Max Hall, I had some hesitation cause the Saints looked like shit last weekend and their offense has yet to bust out.  Week 5 will be the week as the Cardinals are towards the bottom us passing yards allowed per game.
Jaguars team total 0/u 20 points – Also love a hired powered offense with MJD, Garrard and Sims-Walker going off against the worst defense (Bills) who allow 31+ points per game.  Take another over
Good luck
-SD

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O Canada! Our home and Native land…

I’m heading up north for the weekend to dominate St. Catherine’s street, Casino De Montreal all the frenchys better be on notice.

While I am gone a couple things will happen this weekend,

US +160 vs Europe – The Ryder Cup will return to the states (sorry Duce you fucking Commie).  The US and Tiger play well

Bungles -4 @ the Browns – Huge trap game, everyone I will be with this weekend will love the Bungles blowing out Delhomme and company.  This screams trap game as the general public will get crushed here.  Not falling for it, my favorite game of the week. Take Cleveland.

Seth vs Le Casino da Montreal +500, yep I am calling my winnings. This place has treated me well in the past I anticipate winning at least $500 if not more.

I hope my Guy offers curling lines when we are there this weekend, can’t wait

Good luck this weekend,

-SD

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So cash your checks and have a strong month

-SD

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